"I'll earn my pay one way or another...”

That's one of John Wayne's many tough-talking movie lines.

The characters John Wayne played on screen were always self-sufficient, stand-on-your-own-two-feet kind of guys. Whether it was fighting a war, or driving cattle across the prarie, they got the job done. They never complained, made excuses, or asked for help. John Wayne ask for help? Not a chance!

Many people, now in their 60s, 70s, and 80s, moms and dads alike, grew up watching John Wayne movies. And, maybe those movies had a certain influence. Because many of folks of this generation will not ask for help—especially from a son or daughter. We call this type of behavior the John Wayne Syndrome.

Wayne-like self-sufficiency is admirable. But, it can also be dangerous--like when an aging parent overestimates their physical abilities and insists of climbing a ladder to clean out gutters. In that situation, a parent isn't being self-sufficienct, they're being reckless. As people age, the line between self-sufficiency and recklessness gets finer. Who wants to admit that they're no longer  capable of doing things?